Hey there cutie, you sure do remind me of myself. The annoying part that I want to strangle. Yet somehow, I feel the calm beneath the breeze. I look in your eyes and I can see the love and affection you need from me. I want to give it to you. I want to aggravate the storm out of you. I want to see your head spin, desperate for thirst quenching. DE JA VU as I write this about you. That is how I confirm the feelings are true. This post here may embarrass you; I believe that is what it is meant to do. You like the silence and I like the screams. We’d make a perfect team. I think of you and look to the right. You think of me and look to the left. Dynamite. I may let you caress my thighs, until I cry. I have grown away from the sounds I make. Now you are here and all I want is to whisper in your ear; how much I hate to love you.
Dazzled by the wonders of this world. Engaged in every moment. Vicariously living every life. Somehow, lost in a liver pool of possibilities. The “ohhh, what ever shall I be?” When you spend energy looping what could be done. What are you doing? Nothing? Make a move; two or three. See. See what these ideas have in store for you. Try everything three times, in three different places, with three different mind sets. Good, neutral, bad. Can you do it? Can you feel all sides? Can you give it a try? Think about this, not one damn idea is permanent. You can leave anything you have begun. You steer the ship. You lay the pavement as you walk. If you have thought about doing it three times or more, in three different places, give it a go!!! Take the steps to make it! If you find yourself in limitations of why you cannot be where you would like to. Change course. Do something that fits where your life is now. Believe in magic. Believe there are possibilities beyond your own imagination. You can, and will, be whatever your heart desires. Choose wisely. Once your decision is made, look forward. Always look forward. Give it three times before you decide it is no longer for you. Most importantly, know your thoughts. Know the thoughts that make you feel gloom. Know the thoughts you are afraid of. Know the thoughts that bring joy. Know you control your reaction to the thoughts. Know you are on to something magnificent when a negative thought appears. Know you are being tested. If you want something that is beyond your current reach, you must work for it. You will be challenged. Show discipline in the fields you wish to thrive in. The Spirit Guides love discipline. Try not to be like me… ranting and raving in my mind about all the wonderful careers I could choose. Straining my brain imagining what steps must be taken for an outcome. I find myself looking at Step 23 when I am standing on Step 4. The process is where the fun comes out to play. The process will get you recognized. The process become the stories you tell your children. Take the steps, and know, you can always walk down and start up another staircase. Here is a little secret; occasionally the staircases intertwine…
A choice or a blessing? I feel I choose the black sleep role.
I am the first born in this generation of my family. I was in a constant flow state: ecstasy. The times when I was held back, I found ways to continue on. I was a creator. I say was, because creation seemed to be easier as a child (that is a separate letter).
I was the leader. I was a ‘know it all.’ I was fine with playing alone. I had invisible friends. I still do…
Now, I look back and see I am the black sheep. I am the wanderer. I am the Isolated.
Once upon a time, it hurt. Occasionally it hits me that I am not part of my family and I have a small amount of “friends.”
I have woken to see that I am meant for a different dimension. One of Truth, Awareness and Magic.
It can feel lonely at the top; until I fully diminish this mindset and take on the vibrations I belong in.
The million dollar question. Duel-ality; in my head. Is it MY head? Could it be that it is nothing at all? Let me be transparent…
To stay would be to continue in the loop (mind set) I am currently in. “You can change any time you want to,” blah blah blah. Yes, I hear you. Yes, I understand. Now hear me: I am honest and have matured enough to know I am meant for much more than I am currently allowing.
I have the solution before explaining the problem.
Hello, metaphor to life. Think about it; the math professor has the answer to the problem before it is presented to you. In fact, all professors have the answers before they present the questions.
“Well Brianna, science is the act of experiments through questions.”
Right. KNOWING that an answer WILL present itself. The science experiment has a question AND a hypothesis.
Could there be an experiment without words? I will go and find out…